Shopping for Muggles
by ZeroXxKid
Summary: Draco joins Harry for his first grocery trip. Chaos and headaches ensue. A DMHP in a supposedly alternate universe fic.


THIS: Is a DracoHarry fic, meant as a birthday gift to the one and only Jane Leow!

THEY: Are Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter, but I had to put it in a rather AU setting since I have no idea how their personalities are like in the book.

THEN: Have fun reading the story, because it might just turn out to be crack/crap

* * *

"And pray tell, what this building holds in store for us?"

Harry sighed as they walked through the automatic doors, looking back to see Draco staring at them, before tentatively taking a step and running inside. "It's called a supermarket, Draco. Muggles come here to stock up on food so that they won't starve."

They walked down an aisle of bread products, before something caught Draco's eye and he stopped to inspect the item.

"Hey, Draco, you like this kind of bread, right?" Harry was surprised to hear nothing from the boy, and when he looked back, Draco was in the midst of attempting to open a can of bread.

"DRACO MALFOY! WHAT THE AZKABAN ARE YOU TRYING TO DO!?" He ran back and snatched the can out of his hands, shoving it back into the shelf. "Those things cost even more than normal bread! If you opened it, we'd have to pay for it!"

"But Potter! How did they even manage to get bread into such a contraption? Do Muggles know magic?"

"Malfoy, just because it's canned bread doesn't mean that magic was used. Machines were used to pack them and-

"Hey, they even have canned sardine!" They stopped once again, Draco picking up the tin of tuna and glossing over the label. "They even have 12 pieces sandwiched in this small tin!" He tossed it into the shopping cart, before proceeding to inspect other canned items on the shelf.

"Malfoy, do you even like-"

Before Harry could even complete his sentence, several more canned goods were tossed into the shopping cart and Draco was already off to another aisle. Just as Harry caught up with him, Draco was already peering into the freezers of the frozen food section.

"How could anyone eat frozen food?"

"They don't…You microwave them; nobody eats food frozen."

Draco shook his head, before returning to Harry's side. "Then what's the point of having frozen food in the first place? They should have microwaved food then."

Fearing that he would gain a headache from simply trying to explain to Draco that Muggles were sometimes lazy and thus bought frozen food so that they wouldn't need to cook (and give him another reason to gloat that Muggles were inferior people), Harry simply dragged him away from the frozen food section.

"Do you want noodles for dinner tonight?"

Draco seemed to consider it, before nodding his head. "Sure."

Harry nodded his head, reaching out for the bag of instant noodles at his side.

"Potter…what's that?"

"…Noodles?"

"But…" he lifted the bag of noodles out of the cart, testing it in his hands, "It's all…hard…and crunchy…"

"It's dehydrated, Malfoy…You don't expect it to be sitting on the shelf already cooked, do you?" Hearing resounding cracks from where Draco had obviously broke the noodles' brittle packaging; Harry sighed and reached for another bag, taking the manhandled one from Draco's hands and putting it back on the shelf.

"Why'd Muggles go off dehydrating their food when they know that in order to eat it, they'd have to hydrate it again?"

Harry chose not to answer, instead walking off to the fruits section.

'He can't possibly find any faults here', Harry thought as he walked through the tables piled with fruits. However, he did not realize that Draco had wandered off elsewhere amongst the shelves under the 'canned fruits' section.

"Potter!" Hearing his name, Harry turned around, only to despair at the cans in Draco's hands. "I want to see how these fruits taste like. There's no way that they can stuff fruits in there and expect them to last for months. They'd be rotten by then!"

"…We're done shopping," Harry muttered as soon as Draco dumped the cans into the cart, ignoring the protests from Draco about 'wanting to see more canned stuff' and 'can I at least go back and get that canned bread?'

The lady at the counter packed up the last of their canned goods, and she looked at the total amount purchased.

"That will be 50 pounds, sir."

"……."

"Draco." Harry finally said, a vein throbbing at his temple making itself apparent.

"Yes, Harry?"

"I hate you."

"I love you too, Harry."

* * *

Well, to the best of my knowledge, I think 50 pounds is equivalent to approximately 100 Singapore dollars, so about 74 US dollars?

A lot of money spent on canned goods, anyway.

Comments and criticisms are welcomed, especially since I have a feeling there are many other fics out there similiar to this!


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